Introspect

What is a goal? What is the point in achieving that goal, if all we do is set ourselves new goals as soon as we complete our previous objectives? Why do we even bother trying, if everything is a stepping stone to something else? I ask myself these very questions every night before I fall sleep. And yet, I wake up in the morning to begin that mundane routine I call my life all over again.

These days, time has just been flying by. It is like a kaleidoscope of events that you notice, but never remember. Every day is like a cigarette, you don’t realize you have begun smoking until you take the last puff. Like buying a soft drink with all your friends around, by the time you get the bottle there is nothing left.

And all this tension, strife, and sleeping pills. Why? Because you need to stay ahead. You need to outrun the pack of wolves that are nipping at your heels. Who will pounce, cut, and tear you apart at the slightest stumble or misstep. And because of this competition, you find yourself in a battlefield you never knew existed, armed with a sheet of paper the “bosses” call a resume’.

But today I realized what I fought for. What made me get up every day, to want to do the same things all over again. To fight the same battles, and lose the same friends. To make me curse myself, but continue.  

People say love is overrated. People say Star Wars is overrated. There is no link between the two, but people say a lot of things. That doesn’t make it true.

Sometimes the gravity and depth of the word just blows me away. To love someone. To care so much about the other person, that you put their interests and wishes before yours. When you see them happy, it makes your day. Every tacky love story in every language imaginable propagates this theory. But that doesn’t make it any less profound.

It escaped me for some time. I thought what I felt was love, until I felt some something more profound, and thought that this must be love. And then I felt something even more profound. Well, that continued for some time, as you might have guessed, before it dawned on me. Love isn’t the most exhilarating or mind-blowing mental state that you are in. It isn’t what the movies show it to be.

It is basically a fundamental understanding of the other person. Somehow knowing everything while knowing nothing about the other. A joining of two souls in such a way that every nook and cranny of one is complemented by the other. And within this karmic understanding, all the fights and problems are resolved in due course. All the misunderstandings solved. All the insecurities subdued. There is a subconscious understanding that nothing can damage the link that the two lovers share. That this link will last a lifetime. Call me a romantic, but that is how I feel.

And for that, I am ready to fight all the way till kingdom come.